There is an interesting paradox in the UK regarding our infrastructure. The electricity distribution network is totally reliant on telecommunications, whilst the telecommunications network is reliant on electricity. BT et-al can keep the phone network going without the mains as long as their diesel supplies hold up but the reverse is not entirely true.

It is to do with power stations coming on and off line. They have to join the national grid in a very controlled manner and will conversely dip out at the slightest sign of trouble as running on the grid out of sync can be very expensive indeed in new switchgear, generators and turbine halls. The electricity grid providers expect a very fast response over their private comms circuits, typically propagation delays of no more than 10mS. They got it on the original analogue circuits and it was retained when they were moved onto digital circuits running on the then new PDH hierarchy subsequently superceded by SDH.

There is a rather big fly in the ointment, however, in the form of BT’s forthcoming 21st Century network, it seems it isn’t suitable for 20th century power generation as the latency on the new asynchronous IP solution will be no better than 40mS. It also seems that the obligation to provide a guaranteed latency figure has been forgotten about in the mists of time. So, it seems to be a bit of a stalemate then and we can expect the introduction of BT’s new solution to be a little problematic.

I asked my well informed colleague whether there were actually plans in place to bring up the national grid in the event of total shutdown. It seems that they do exist at a regional level. How long would it take? About a week…..

Chatting on the phone tonight, she asked me what I thought of Charles & Camilla. My reply was indifference and annoyance. I’m not particularly bothered about the whole thing and annoyed that the Beeb devoted so much airtime to it on PM.

Topic drifted onto the job being a calling like the Pope & I pointed out that Popes aren’t born into the role, it is sorted out with white smoke. She said the cardinals elect like the Masons. I immediately said BALLS. Sorry? she asked.

“The masons use Balls for ballots, hence the term blackballed” I replied. It is a good job she didn’t take offence…

Morley doesn’t have a Theatre or a Cinema. Not strictly true, as it has both, it is just that the buildings serve other purposes. The New Pavilion Theatre has become Puccinos (via a Cinema, Bingo & Davy Ravy Gravy venue) whilst the other picture house became a Fine Fare and part of it is ironically now a Blockbuster Video.

What it does have is the Alexandra Hall which is a splendid victorian room in the Town Hall complete with wrap-around balcony. What it doesn’t have, however, is a proper stage- only a platform. It is wonderful for Brass Band Concerts but not too hot for shows. There are hardly any stage lights and the chandeliers have got those horrible energy lamps in them so they can only switch on or off.

To get round this, the local societies bring in a fit-up stage which whilst making the shows more theatrical doesn’t get round the basic problem of no wing space, no storage space, no scenery space and convoluted entrances for the performers.

The hall is well used, although the most common performance involves beds and needles instead of rows of seats. I don’t mean it is a hothouse of sex & drugs & rock & roll, it is a regular blood donor centre. At least you get a biscuit…

Seen written in the dirt on the back of a petrol tanker on the M62 this afternoon…

How’s my driving? Phone 0800-EAT-SHIT

It made her indoors laugh!

Some naughty people have been using their mobiles indiscriminately during Council meetings & the Mayor is not happy.

Consequently, a discussion item appeared at Full Council on Wednesday about a possible change to Standing Orders forbidding use of mobiles in meetings and infractors to pay a fiver to the mayor’s charity as punishment. Whilst supporting the principle, I felt that mandating a figure into Standing Orders was a bit extreme and argued that charity was a personal thing and could not be considered a donation if it was extracted as a fine. As it happened no-one seconded my position but it wasn’t put forward to go into Standing Orders anyway so is effectively an informal guideline.

I also had plan b) up my sleeve, which was that anything proposed and seconded for standing orders should then be deferred without discussion. My view on that wasn’t as a stalling tactic, just that if we have rules of procedure then we should actually follow them and Standing Orders are deliberately designed to be difficult to change so that there might be more of a chance of people thinking about the consequences, intended or otherwise.

The term “Mobile phonegate” was coined after a diatribe about the goings on at a planning meeting where I had sent my apologies due to being in London but managed to get to half an hour after the start. Not being there I missed out on comings & goings, vibrating pockets, unheard apologies & various states of Quorate/inquorate transition. I wasn’t overly endeared to be given a bit part and described as having “rolled up” but was advised this is a Morley term and not a suggestion of being lackadaisical. I did arrive in a motor vehicle which is one of the definitions….