Shades of Grey

A feature in today’s daily mail defends supposedly useless 70s gadgets such as the Sodastream, Fondue sets and the Goblin Teasmade. (They are in a list of a top 20, although the site the article refers to isn’t properly live yet).

I first encountered a Teasmade in a small hotel in the late 70’s when I was installing phone systems around the country. I don’t remember which specific hotel but it may have been one rather unusual one I stayed in at Cannock Chase. It only had about six rooms but the reception had more than thirty keys on the board. (It must have been every cupboard & padlock in the place). The rooms were fairly normal but what was unusual was the bathroom- it was a large room with the bath in the centre & with thick shagpile carpet. (The bedrooms themselves weren’t en-suite).

When I first encountered the Teasmade it was curiousity that made me fill it and set it up. It was basically a glorified alarm clock but instead of sounding an alarm, it boiled a metal kettle instead. The kettle bit was sealed so that once it reached boiling point, the water squirted out under pressure into a ceramic teapot. The kettle was on a sprung platform that raised up as the water transferred from the kettle to the teapot, at which point a changeover switch would operate, the light would come on and the buzzer would sound.

I actually found it a pleasant way to be woken up as it would would progressively get noisier over several minutes, although the buzzer was a bit severe. After encountering another one somewhere else and repeatingt he process, I eventually noticed one in Coventry Exchange & Mart, a large 2nd hand shop in town, & bought it for a song.

I vaguely have memories of having a clock radio version later (probably after the local Radio Station started, Mercia Sound), although as I had a semi-live-in girlfriend by then, I found nicer ways to be woken up!

The other useless object celebrated was the Sodastream, a device for carbonating water. Everything the Daily Mail says about it is true- they didn’t make enough pop as the bottles were too small, the concentrates didn’t taste very nice, the bubbles weren’t as good as real pop, they got messy & sticky, the CO2 bottles themselves were quite expensive and you had to take your old one in with you. Overall they were rather Cak, but good fun for a kid.

(The post title is a possible urban myth that Goblin wanted to use that slogan for an annual promotion but they were told that it would break advertising rules)

There is nothing quite like having a temporary affliction to help you notice the same handicap in others. Last summer, when I had my head shaved, I suddenly became acutely aware of how many other blokes had little or no hair. My trips round ASDA or into town were fascinating insights into male tonsorial trends, something I was somewhat indifferent to beforehand (and am again).

When I broke my leg earlier in the year, I became acutely aware of how many other people had a limp, a walking stick or crutches. When I made use of the ASDA scooter, I became a lot more conscious of others doing the same.

However, a few months ago, I started to notice something a little unusual, occasional people getting round with one crutch although they didn’t seem to actually need it. They tended to look somewhat “scratter”ish and sometimes they were outside pubs or clubs in the smoking areas.

Why did they stick out? I don’t really know, just a feeling that it was a little odd.

Then, I read Barry Beelzebub recently and the penny dropped.

(Why am I mentioning it now? Word association football. It is four months since my accident and I am taking the crutches back to the hospital tomorrow. I haven’t used a walking stick since Barcelona and whilst I’m still slow and tire easily, I managed to cut the grass yesterday afternoon).

(Image from NHS BRI Orthopaedics website page)