Living by numbers
During the summer break, our pre-teen Son David spent a week in London with his Grandma. That gave Karen and myself free run of the house for more than just a weekend and we were determined to make the most of it, doing things we couldn’t readily do with Children.
However, as we don’t go out boozing and scoffing very much, that didn’t really leave that much in the repertoire. Karen wasn’t tempted by Spearmint Rhino, or indeed a trip to Morley Working Mens Club with the occasional beer-mates. We did take in a 15 film (The taking of Pelham 123) and we had a trip to Leeds Gala Bingo, somewhere we haven’t been since before the smoking ban. When we were there, we noticed three things that were different. Firstly, it didn’t smell of smoke any more, other than outside the front doors where the snoutcasts congregated. Secondly, it wasn’t as busy as it used to be, no doubt a combination of the smoking ban and the recession. Thirdly, they had gone hi-tech, with the availability of wedge shaped electronic bingo player machines, called “Gala Wiz”. We had bought traditional paper tickets by then, but being a gadget man, I was keen to investigate the technology on a subsequent occasion.
Big club bingo isn’t like seaside prize bingo, by the way. There is none of the “two fat ladies” banter and the punters just want the numbers. Bingo is a regulated recreation and is considered on the lower rungs of the gambling ladder. It is based totally on chance, although a lack of skill in marking off the numbers will scupper your chances somewhat! The numbers do come fast and if you haven’t done it before, you will struggle.
At a typical Bingo session, several hundred people will lob their money into an imaginary bucket and then try to win back more than they lobbed in. Of course, there is a saying that in a Casino the House always wins and at the races the bookie always wins. Bingo Halls are heavily regulated on the size of the House take and there is a near-illegible set of tables near the entrance that the club is obliged to display, summarising ticket sales and pot size. (This information is also flashed up on the large screens for certain other games involving more than one club. Needless to say, no-one is interested in this information).
So, when you are sitting there with your ninety numbers spread across six tickets you have statistically the same odds as everyone else of winning a line, two lines or a full house. The more people playing and the more combinations of tickets though, the faster the wins get called by players because statistically life is like that, as are numbers. Indeed as numbers get called, they tend over time to more-or-less evenly distribute themselves across all six tickets and even if you are only waiting for one number to come up, the odds are exactly the same as any other uncalled number coming up. (This is known as the Bingo Buzz, waiting for the one number that wins you a big prize, or, more likely, not!)
Our session at Gala Leeds was to win us the grand total of zilch, although it was interesting to notice a couple of changes to the way things worked. Previously, there were two sets of big prize games, the Link games (where many clubs play together linked up via audio-conference & integrated calling) and the National game (not played linked but the numbers are distributed electronically to the clubs) where there is a House winner for a small prize, a regional winner for a medium prize and a national winner for a big prize.
Now, at Gala, the national game has gone; it has been replaced by a big Link game (called High 5) that ups the odds by introducing a bookie gamble. There are two games played in the book, the first one being linked, the second one in the hall only (with much smaller winnings, of course).
As well as four (or five) figure prizes for lines and full house, if the caller calls House with the number ending in 5, then they win 10% of a substantial pot that rolls over each week if not claimed. (It was getting on for £200k when we were there). If the winner calls on the actual number 5, then they win 50% of the pot, and the other 50% is distributed amongst everyone else in that Bingo Hall playing. (They actually write you a cheque the following week, they don’t have that sort of money in the Safe!).
Now I imagine that Gala have a small team of highly paid gambling Actuaries who actually work out the statistical odds of these types of games not making them go bust, so it is probably a fairly safe bet on their part, provided that the odds don’t come up too much at the fringes as they reset the pot to a minimum figure each win. They have now introduced a bit of vertical marketing called the “side bet” where for an extra pound on certain games, if you happen to win within fifty numbers then you get double the prize money. (This type of incentive was entirely illegal not too long ago, when you had to join a club at least 24 hours before you played. Now you can roll up, register and start playing. (You do have to prove you are over eighteen though, we can’t have married children gambling, can we?))
Anyway, a Bingo Hall is a strange mixture of tension and boredom. It requires a fair bit of concentration to pick out the numbers called on your ticket and if your mind wanders, you are scuppered as you have to claim a win there and then, i.e. the last number called has to be on the winning line. Every time someone makes a claim, there is a small babble of conversation where everyone exchanges banalities “Eeh, I was only one away”, “I wasn’t even close”, etc. (Not as much fun as the Galway Races Primal Scream I blogged about previously though). It is supposedly a social club as well and the bar is certainly keenly priced, but there is the constant drone of the Parti Bingo between sessions, a game even harder to play as the numbers come fast and furious, even if there are only eighty of them. (Parti Bingo is like a fairground barker trying to make you part with your money in bigger and better games, just another pound in the slot, go on, you know you want to…)
Anyway, in the spirit of blogger investigative research, I’ve now tried out three different Bingo Hall automated systems over the last couple of months and I am consolidating a report. In the meantime, here is a musical interlude…
4 Responses to “Living by numbers”
HOUSE!!!!
False call, false call.
The last number was…
Was she worth it?
(76)
I know I’d never keep up with them calling the numbers fast!
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